


We Remain

by TheAO3DreamWalker



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 23:39:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3914983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAO3DreamWalker/pseuds/TheAO3DreamWalker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And I fear that… this will never change between us because… we… will never change and we will always… remain this way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Remain

**Author's Note:**

> I feel that this couple doesn't have enough attention.

**We Remain**

 

Everyone has someone to love and it became clear that they were all found in this club of ours.  Hinata and Kageyama took the first step and became the first couple in the club. Asahi and Nishinoya followed after them and became a couple. Daichi and Sugawara we’re always into each other I assume. It just seemed that way but maybe because they were third years that they held back but even so, you could tell that they were also in love. Even Yamaguchi and Tsukishima seemed to have worked their situation out and it’s a big thing because Tsukishima is just so… Tsukishima and Yamaguchi... was definitely a person who we all thought were straight.  

 

So now, that would make Tanaka, Ennoshita, Narita and I the only straight guys in the club but slowly… I can see that maybe, just maybe, Tanaka and Ennoshita can change that into two. They’ve gotten closer, not that I mind but it’s… very disappointing. It really is because no matter what, Narita and I will always remain friends. No more than that.

 

And I fear that… this will never change between us because… we… will never change and we will always… remain this way.

 

_“I… I like you…” Narita whispered quietly through the truding of their footsteps. Kinoshita slowly turned around and looked at Narita with his eyes looking down at his feet. Their warm breath floating in the air on the cold winter day._

 

_“But you don’t have to say… anything. At all! I-I know… that you…” every word that came out of his lips… pained him, “you don’t really like this but… I just wanted to get this off my chest because… I… I really can’t keep this in my heart anymore.” The tears falling on the snow and his shaky breaths could be heard through the falling of the snow. “I’m sorry.”_

 

_Narita slowly starting walking but he didn’t stop for Kinoshita. Kino raised a hand to stop him but  Narita let out a pained chuckle. “Please, just let me walk this alone. I don’t want it to be awkward for you so please… just please, let me walk alone.”_

 

_Kino’s hand slowly dropped down to his side as he watched his best friend walk through the snow alone. From the distance he could hear his shaky breaths and suddenly there were tears in his own eyes. He slowly dropped to his knees._

 

_“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”_

 

A year has already gone and passed. Now we’re third years. Our very last year together.... will probably end in tears.

 

I hope… that, he can move on. He should be happy because after all, waiting for me isn’t worth it.

 

_“It’s funny isn’t it.” Narita said from Kino’s side. “It’s another cold winter day just like last year.” He had such a painful look in his eyes before looking at Kino._

 

_“Yeah, I guess.” he replied bitterly. He didn’t want to talk about this because he knew that no matter what… they would both be hurt._

 

_They stood there for a moment, listening to the snow fall on the ground, hearing each other;s breath and waiting for something to happen._

 

_“Well, let’s get going.” Narita said and rushed ahead of Kino but suddenly came to a stop. He loosened the scarf around his neck and sighed loudly. He took in a breath, combed his hand through his hair and turned around to look and Kino._

 

_“You know… I don’t think that I’m ever gonna get over you… like at all because I hang around different people, different friends but they aren’t like you. I tried to fall in love all over again but I just end up looking for you in them. It’s really hurtful you know? Because no matter what, I will always love you… and I-” he inhaled a shaky breath and wiped his tearful eyes, “I don’t think that I will ever stop. It’s come this far and I know that in this past year, you haven’t changed your mind. I… sometimes, you get me hopeful and then you realize it and then you shut me down because I know that you care for me so you do that.”_

 

_He sighed and raked a hand through his hair. “But I just get so hopeful you know? This is our last year together… and I really, really didn’t want it to end like this because Spring is so near and I haven’t found the right time to ever tell you this but I’m going to Tokyo. Eight years is really long… Kinoshita.”_

 

_Tears fell and Kino felt a pang in his chest._

 

_“It really is long. I don’t want to be so far apart but… it’s life. I know that I’m going to miss you a lot. I don’t expect you to come with me and I don’t- no, I can’t stay.” He wiped his tears silently, one after another. “And I found it so hard to honestly tell you this. It’s no use of me to tell you I love you because no matter what… we remain.”_

 

_All that could be heard was their rigid breathing, the movement of them wiping their tears, and the snow falling onto the ground._

 

I turned around and started walking. I knew it… I knew that I would end up breaking down in front of him if I really said my feelings. I hate leaving him alone in the snow like this but this… this would be the last time. This will be the last time that I do this.

 

_Kino couldn’t believe that this was happening all over again. Narita’s retreating back and him on his knees crying like he’s lost everything in life._

 

_“I’m sorry.... I’m really sorry Narita…”_

 

I couldn’t say it. I could properly tell him but he knew. He knew that no matter what I wouldn’t say yes, and now he’s going to tokyo. So many miles away from where I am. Now, I’m just going to cry my heart out because no matter what… we remain.

 

This pang of hurt that you feel in your chest is your heart closing up from the pain. It’s a defense mechanism that your heart has learned over the years. In order for you to not be hurt, your heart closes but it still hurts doesn’t it? Because when your heart tries to close down, it shuts of everything in your memories and it sucks out all of the air in your life. All the breaths that you’ve inhaled in that moment, gone. All the memories you’ve engraved in your head, erased. You are just an empty shell experiencing the last of emotion left in your body.

 

 


End file.
